FRED'S BLOG

How Do You Know When You Are In Love?

Posted: 2012-02-01 02:23:19

When I returned to elementary school from my summer vacation at the beginning of sixth grade, I noticed that a new girl had joined our class.  She was seated directly to my left…..and she was beautiful! I remember thinking that she was the prettiest girl that I had ever seen. I was in love!

How simple life was then. All it took was one look, and we knew if we were smitten. No questions needed to be asked. No experiences needed to be shared. No common interests or values needed to be ascertained. A quick, simple reaction told us everything we needed to know.

My, how life has changed! Today’s romantics find themselves overwhelmed with a myriad of questions and challenges. Physical attraction, once consuming most of what we thought was love, has by necessity been forced to share the stage with so many other considerations.

Is he a good provider? Will he provide me security in my later years? Is she sexy enough? Will she age well, and be energetic enough to keep up with my lifestyle? Is he stable, dependable and predictable? Is she financially responsible, a fair and just communicator, and consistently supportive? Will she care for me if I stumble or become ill? Will he be patient and tolerant with me if I get moody? Is he financially and spiritually generous? Will she be caring and sensitive to my needs? Will he be interested in my friends and family? Does she share my intellectual need for growth? The questions are endless. The years have only added more items to our laundry lists.

With time and experiences almost all of our questions can be answered. But, does that mean, if we are pleased with our conclusions, that we are now in love? And, more importantly, how can we tell personally when we are in love?

Perhaps it’s fair to say that each one of us will probably answer that question differently. I know that for me, my answers today tend to be a bit different than they might have been 20 or, certainly, 40 years... Read more